Why we women can – and should – have mood swings

“You’re so sensitive again today.” “Are you on your period?” “So moody again?” How often have we women heard these sentences – as a reproach, as an attempt to explain, as a condescending categorization of our emotional world. As if emotional flexibility is a flaw, a malfunction, something that is best trained away or at least well hidden. In reality, these sentences describe something deeply biological, feminine – and completely healthy: the hormonal dynamics of the female cycle.

Mood swings in women are not a whim, an exaggeration or a sign of weakness. They are the vivid, measurable expression of a finely tuned hormonal orchestra that takes you through four clearly distinguishable phases month after month – each with its own biochemical signature, its own emotional quality, its own physical expressions. Those who know these phases understand themselves in a way that no personality test in the world can. Because this is not about character. It’s about chemistry – and how deeply this chemistry reaches into our psyche, our perception and our relationships.

This article is an invitation to re-read your cycle. Not as a problem that needs to be solved. But rather as a source of information, as an inner map, as a monthly offer from your body to get to know yourself better.

The two main players: oestrogen and progesterone

Before we look at the individual phases, it is worth really understanding the two central hormones of the female cycle – not just as names on a lab note, but in their full depth and range of action. This is because oestrogen and progesterone are not isolated “reproductive hormones”. They are system messengers that affect every cell in your body, shape your nervous system, influence your mood and literally change your brain.

Oestrogen – build-up, activation, connection

Oestrogen – more precisely: estradiol, the most biologically active form – has an activating, restorative and growth-stimulating effect in the body. It is the hormone of the first half of the cycle, of energy, of opening up to the outside world. Its effects extend far beyond the reproductive organs.

In the brain, oestrogen is a powerful neurotransmitter modulator. It increases serotonin availability by both boosting the rate of production and increasing the sensitivity of receptors – resulting in improved mood, emotional stability and stress resilience. It increases dopamine, the neurotransmitter of motivation, drive and anticipation. It promotes the release of endorphins, which create a deep sense of well-being. And it stimulates BDNF – Brain-Derived Neurotrophic Factor – a growth factor for nerve cells that is associated with better learning ability, sharper memory and cognitive flexibility. Oestrogen also has a neuroprotective effect: it protects nerve cells from damage and ageing processes.

This explains why you feel clearer in the first half of your cycle, are more communicative, have more self-confidence and can make social connections more easily. It’s not imagination – it’s neurobiology.

Physically, oestrogen has an equally broad effect: it promotes collagen production and ensures firmer skin, elasticity and moisture. It improves the cholesterol profile (HDL increases, LDL decreases) and has a vasodilating effect – the cardiovascular system benefits. It influences insulin sensitivity and metabolism. It makes the cervical mucus thin and thus the fertile phase recognizable. And it builds up the lining of the uterus to prepare for potential implantation.

Important to know: An excess or imbalance of oestrogen – for example in the case of so-called oestrogen dominance, i.e. when the progesterone level is relatively too low – can increase inner restlessness, irritability and emotional hypersensitivity. So more oestrogen is not always better. The decisive factor is the ratio.

Progesterone – calm, stability, depth

Progesterone is functionally the antagonist of oestrogen – and this term is meant quite benevolently. Like breathing in and breathing out, we need both. Progesterone tends to have a balancing, calming and inward-looking effect. It is the hormone of the second half of the cycle, of calmness, of regeneration.

A crucial detail that is often misunderstood: Progesterone is normally very low in the first half of the cycle. It only rises significantly after ovulation – because the corpus luteum, which forms from the ruptured follicle, then produces progesterone. This means that all the effects that we attribute to progesterone are primarily experienced during the luteal phase – the second half of the cycle. Progesterone is barely noticeable before that.

In the brain, progesterone acts directly on the GABA system via its degradation products, above all allopregnanolone. GABA is the brain’s most important inhibitory neurotransmitter – it has a calming, anxiolytic effect and reduces neuronal hyperexcitability. Allopregnanolone binds to the same receptors as benzodiazepines – only in a physiological way. The result: inner calm, relaxation, a deeper need for sleep and a greater willingness to introspect. In this phase you withdraw, you need less social drive – and that makes perfect sense.

Physically, progesterone increases the basal body temperature by around 0.3 to 0.5 degrees after ovulation – this signal is measurable and is used in natural family planning. It slows down intestinal peristalsis, which can lead to a feeling of heaviness and bloating. It affects the mammary gland tissue – hence the typical feeling of tightness in the second half of the cycle. It can increase appetite, as the basal metabolic rate rises slightly during this phase. And it has an antagonistic effect on oestrogen with regard to water retention: If there is sufficient progesterone, the draining effect is noticeable – if it is lacking, the oestrogen effects increase.

If progesterone is too low – which occurs in many women, often due to chronic stress, as cortisol and progesterone compete for the same biochemical precursor – the calming counter-effect to oestrogen is missing. The result: restlessness, sleep problems, increased susceptibility to stress, increased PMS symptoms. This is one of the most common and at the same time most overlooked hormonal imbalances.

The ratio is decisive – not the individual value

The most important thing you can understand about oestrogen and progesterone is this: It’s not the absolute value of a single hormone that determines your wellbeing – it’s the ratio of the two to each other and the timing of their rise and fall. Relatively too much oestrogen and too little progesterone at the same time – this is oestrogen dominance – leads to irritability, water retention, breast tenderness and increased PMS symptoms. Conversely, too little oestrogen can cause depression, cognitive blurring and listlessness. Oestrogen stands for development, activation, openness and performance. Progesterone stands for calming, stabilization, withdrawal and integration. Both are necessary. Both are female. Both belong to you.

Phase 1: Menstruation – letting go, pausing, renewing (day 1-5)

What happens hormonally?

Oestrogen and progesterone are at their absolute lowest point. This is the direct trigger for menstruation: because the progesterone level drops, the endometrium – the lining of the uterus that has built up during the cycle – no longer receives the necessary hormonal support and is shed. At the same time, prostaglandins are released, inflammation-promoting messenger substances that cause the uterus to contract – this is the mechanism behind menstrual pain and cramps. The higher the prostaglandin level, the stronger the contractions. FSH also begins to rise slightly again – the starting signal for the next follicle maturation process is already given during the bleeding.

Body and psyche in this phase

You’re exhausted – and for good reason. Your body is doing real work right now. It is shedding tissue while at the same time rebuilding it, regulating inflammatory processes and controlling the amount of bleeding and perception of pain. Energy that would otherwise flow outwards is now being directed inwards. This is not a failure of your body – it is a system that has its priorities right.

Emotionally, this phase is characterized by a distinctive quality: You are inward-looking. The mood is grounded, sometimes heavy, sometimes melancholy. Small things affect you more than usual. The need for retreat, silence and warmth is real and has a direct biochemical cause: serotonin is low, dopamine is low, the brightening effect of oestrogen is not noticeable. Your nervous system is not geared towards high performance – it is geared towards regeneration.

In traditional Chinese medicine, the menstrual phase is considered the deepest yin phase of the cycle: a moment of emptying, of letting go, of stillness before the new movement. The blood – in TCM an expression of the essence of life – is released and this process demands respect. Cultures that knew menstruation rites did not treat this phase as a weakness, but as a threshold time: between what was and what is to come. This is not a romantic concept – it is an apt description of what happens biochemically.

What is psychosomatically interesting is what often comes to the surface in this phase: truths that were overlooked or suppressed in the other phases. When the oestrogen rush is over, when the calming effect of progesterone has dissipated – then what really is remains. Some women experience tears during menstruation without knowing exactly why. Others experience a sudden clarity, an honesty towards themselves that is not so clear in other phases. This is not instability. This is the voice of your system finally speaking up.

What your body needs:

Warmth – internally and externally. Warm meals, warm drinks, a hot water bottle on the lower abdomen. Iron-rich foods such as pulses, seeds, dark leafy vegetables and red meat to compensate for iron loss due to bleeding. No high intensity exercise – gentle exercise such as walking or yin yoga is ideal, intense exercise increases prostaglandin levels and therefore pain. And above all, give yourself permission to slow down. Not because you’re weak – but because your system needs something other than speed right now.

Phase 2: The follicle phase – awakening, lightness and new strength (day 6-13)

What happens hormonally?

The end of menstruation marks the start of the follicular phase – one of the most powerful phases of the female cycle. FSH rises and signals to the ovaries: it’s time. Several follicles begin to mature, each of them a small package consisting of an egg cell and the granulosa cells surrounding it. One of these follicles asserts itself – it becomes dominant, grows and increasingly produces oestrogen. The oestrogen level rises continuously and significantly. Progesterone remains at a very low level at this stage – the corpus luteum does not yet exist and there is no significant source of progesterone. This means that this phase belongs almost exclusively to oestrogen. And you can feel it in every part of your body and mind.

Body and psyche in this phase

Your energy is back – and significantly so. Your sleep improves. The pain of menstruation is over. Your body feels lighter. And this is not just subjective: oestrogen has a direct analgesic effect, it increases pain tolerance, improves sleep architecture and has an anti-inflammatory effect. Your connective tissue is more supple, your skin clearer, your hair shinier. Oestrogen stimulates collagen production – that’s not cosmetics, that’s biochemistry.

What happens in the brain during this phase is remarkable. Serotonin, dopamine and endorphins are all elevated. BDNF is increasingly released. The result: you are clearer in your head. You learn faster. You remember things better. You have ideas, you want to implement them, you have the energy to do so. Your stress resilience is higher than at any other time in the cycle. Conflicts are resolved more easily because your nervous system is not on alert.

You are emotionally open-minded, communicative and socially driven. Your empathy is high – but not at the expense of your own power to act. You are simultaneously empathetic and energetic, creative and strong in implementation. It’s no coincidence that in the follicle phase you feel like you could turn the world upside down. That’s not an exaggeration – that’s oestrogen.

What your body loves:

More intensive exercise – strength, endurance, interval training – your body regenerates more quickly in this phase and tolerates greater strain. Start new projects, make decisions, have conversations you’ve been putting off for a long time. Lighter, fresh food – your digestive system is more efficient, the bloating and heaviness of the luteal phase have disappeared. Use this phase for things that require concentration and courage. Your system is now ready for it.

Phase 3: Ovulation – the peak of female power (approx. day 14)

What happens hormonally?

Ovulation is the most dramatic hormonal moment of the entire cycle. Oestrogen has reached its peak and triggers an explosive increase in LH via a feedback loop to the pituitary gland – the so-called LH peak. This LH peak is the direct signal for the follicle, which has become dominant, to burst and release the mature egg. At the same time, testosterone also increases significantly for a short time – for 24 to 48 hours. Oestrogen remains at a high level. The system is in full swing.

Body and psyche in this phase

You’re in top form – and that’s not a metaphor. Your physical performance is at its peak. Your energy levels are at their maximum. Your immune system is particularly active during this phase – according to evolutionary biology, this makes sense: the body is preparing for a potential pregnancy and ensuring that the environment is optimal.

The short testosterone surge around ovulation is a peak that is often underestimated. Testosterone doesn’t just give you an increased libido – it gives you determination, clarity, a willingness to take risks and increased self-esteem. You are less inclined to apologize. You say what you want more clearly. You feel physically strong and present. This phase is the biological counterpart to what you experience in the luteal phase: Where sensitivity and restraint dominate there, here there is radiance and directness.

Your body signals fertility – and this can be felt in every cell. The cervical mucus changes to a clear, stretchy consistency. The basal body temperature rises slightly after ovulation – a measurable, reliable signal. Some women perceive ovulation through a slight pulling or stinging sensation in the abdomen – the so-called Mittelschmerz – a direct body signal that you can learn to read and classify.

Emotionally, you literally radiate during this phase. Studies have shown that women around ovulation are perceived by others as more attractive, more confident and more magnetic – regardless of whether the observers knew which phase of the cycle the women were in. This is biology expressed in appearance.

What your body loves:

This phase is short – use it consciously. Intense sporting achievements, important conversations, presentations, social encounters where you want to be present. And: notice how you feel. Not to record it – but to have a reference point for what will be different in the luteal phase.

Phase 4: The luteal phase – depth, sensitivity and the voice of the inner life (day 15-28)

What happens hormonally?

After ovulation, the ruptured follicle turns into a temporary gland: the corpus luteum. This now produces progesterone in steadily increasing quantities. Progesterone takes over the leading role – this is a fundamental change in the hormonal environment that you can feel in every cell. Oestrogen rises again slightly in the early luteal phase, i.e. shows a second, weaker peak, but then drops significantly together with progesterone towards the end of the phase.

The progesterone peak is typically 5 to 8 days after ovulation. In a 28-day cycle, this is usually around cycle day 21 – which is why this day is often chosen as the measuring point for progesterone. However, this rule of thumb has an important limitation: it only applies if ovulation has actually taken place around day 14. If ovulation occurs later, the progesterone peak shifts accordingly. It is therefore always more precise than “day 21”: approx. 7 days after the individual ovulation.

If pregnancy has not occurred, the corpus luteum begins to atrophy after its peak. Progesterone and oestrogen drop sharply. This drop is the direct starting signal for the next menstruation – and the biochemical background for PMS.

Body and psyche in this phase

You slow down. It’s not your imagination – it’s progesterone. Via its active metabolite allopregnanolone, it has a direct effect on the brain’s GABA-A receptors: calming, anxiolytic, dampening. You are calmer, but also heavier. More thoughtful, but also more exhausted. Deeper in feeling, but also more sensitive.

Physically, this phase is clearly noticeable: digestion slows down, which can lead to a feeling of bloating and heaviness. The tissue retains more water – water retention in the legs, stomach and hands is normal and hormonal. The breasts become more sensitive due to the influence of progesterone on the glandular tissue. The body temperature is 0.3 to 0.5 degrees higher than in the first half of the cycle. The basal metabolic rate increases slightly – you consume more calories and the feeling of hunger increases accordingly.

Emotionally, you are built close to the water – and that is exactly how it should be understood biologically. Towards the end of the luteal phase, oestrogen drops – and with it the supply of serotonin. Serotonin not only regulates mood, but also emotional stability, irritability tolerance and a sense of inner security. When this buffer is lost, everything hits you harder. Criticism hits harder. Small things can seem disproportionately large. Unresolved conflicts rise to the top unbidden.

This is not a fault in your system. This is depth. The luteal phase makes you receptive to the inner life. Your mental defenses are lower. Whatever you have kept under the surface in the other phases – in the luteal phase it comes up. Your own needs that you have ignored. Relationship dynamics that are bothering you. Situations in your life that aren’t right. The luteal phase is the most honest phase of the cycle. Not the most pleasant – but the most honest.

Psychosomatically, this is a gift disguised as a curse. Many PMS symptoms are not purely a hormonal issue – they are the force of unprocessed content that is perceived with increased intensity during this more sensitive phase. The body signal is real. But its meaning goes beyond biochemistry.

When oestrogen and progesterone drop sharply in the last few days, classic PMS symptoms appear: irritability, depressed mood, crying spells, sleep disorders, cravings for sweets or carbohydrates. The latter is a direct attempt by the body to compensate for the drop in serotonin via the insulin mechanism – because carbohydrates lead to the serotonin precursor tryptophan reaching the brain better via insulin. This is not a weakness of willpower. It’s your body knowing exactly what it needs.

Particularly important: Many PMS symptoms are less related to the absolute progesterone level, but rather to the drop – or an unfavorable ratio of estrogen to progesterone over the entire cycle. Oestrogen dominance – when progesterone is too low relative to oestrogen – is one of the most common causes of pronounced PMS. It manifests itself through irritability, water retention, breast tenderness and a depressed mood. A diagnosis using a saliva hormone profile, which is taken on several cycle days, provides clear answers here.

What your body needs:

Magnesium – it is increasingly used during the luteal phase and its deficiency significantly increases PMS symptoms. Vitamin B6 – it is involved in serotonin production and can noticeably alleviate depressed mood and irritability. Healthy fats and proteins instead of sugar – to keep blood sugar stable and reduce cravings. Less caffeine – it increases anxiety and sleep problems during this already sensitive period. More sleep than usual – your body needs it. And: take the need to withdraw seriously. Not as a step backwards – as self-care.

Mood swings are not a mistake – they are information

If you look at the four phases and the hormonal processes – the rhythm – in their entirety, something very fundamental becomes clear: there is not a single moment in your cycle that does not have a purpose. The exhaustion of menstruation is not a failure – it is a biologically necessary retreat. The lightness of the follicular phase is not luck – it is oestrogen. The radiance around ovulation is not self-delusion – it is the biological maximum. And the sensitivity of the luteal phase is not instability – it is depth.

Every mood has a biochemical signature. Every fluctuation is part of an ordered system. This doesn’t mean that you can’t do anything if you’re not feeling well. It means that you can stop feeling ashamed about it. Because shame makes symptoms worse – this is not a spiritual concept, but a neurobiological reality. Shame activates the stress system, increases cortisol. And increased cortisol competes with progesterone for the same biochemical precursor – which promotes progesterone deficiency and exacerbates PMS. So stress literally makes hormonal imbalances worse.

You live four inner seasons every month: the winter of menstruation, the spring of the follicular phase, the summer of ovulation and the fall of the luteal phase. In none of these seasons are you less you. You are complete in every phase – just in a different quality of you. Fighting winter does not make it shorter. Understanding it makes it more bearable – and sometimes even valuable.

The real problem is not caused by these fluctuations. It arises from the expectation of not being allowed to have them. It arises from a social model that defines linear, uniform motivation as the norm – and forgets that this is a male time pattern. A male hormone cycle lasts 24 hours. High testosterone in the morning, low in the evening – this is the cycle that the working world, school system and society are geared towards. Your cycle lasts 28 days. You are in a different rhythm. And this rhythm is not wrong – it is feminine. And that’s a different kind of strength that needs no apology.

What you can do: Cycle support instead of cycle control

The first and most important step is observation – without judgment. Keep a cycle diary. Note down every day: your mood, your physical energy, particular symptoms, sleep quality, hunger, social needs. You don’t need a complicated system for this – a few key words in the evening are enough. After just two or three cycles, you will recognize patterns that will amaze you. This is because your cycle is extremely consistent. Certain feelings return at the same time of the cycle. Certain body signals are more familiar than you thought. This knowledge gives you predictability in what previously seemed chaotic.

If PMS is pronounced – if the luteal phase is regularly characterized by severe irritability, depressed mood, sleep disorders or physical discomfort – it is worth checking the hormone balance diagnostically. A saliva hormone profile, which is taken on several days of the cycle, provides a differentiated picture: Is there oestrogen dominance? Is the progesterone level too low in the luteal phase? Is progesterone built up early enough after ovulation? These questions can be answered – and based on these answers, targeted support options can be used. Important: The measurement around cycle day 21 is a helpful guide, but a measurement around 7 days after the individual ovulation is always more precise – because only then does it hit the actual progesterone peak.

Cycle-appropriate nutrition, phase-appropriate exercise, targeted micronutrient supply – magnesium and vitamin B6 in the luteal phase, iron during menstruation, sufficient healthy fats for overall hormone production – and, last but not least, psychosomatic confrontation with the issues that come to the surface in the luteal phase: All of this makes a significant difference. Not to eliminate the fluctuations. But to live in them, to work with them, to understand them for what they are: a living, breathing system that recalibrates every month – and that invites you to get a little closer to yourself. Not despite your sensitivity. But through them.